Vermonty

Shura and I took a little road trip through our past this weekend.  Being a big transitional time in her life, it was really powerful to go back to the places where our adult lives began and to realize how much we have changed since then... it was a nice reminder that the current changes are, in some ways, no different.

We drove up to Brattleboro around 4 on Saturday and headed for the co-op to get a bite to eat, and then made our way onto Marlboro.  Pulling off 91 at exit 1 in Vermont brought back a rush, more for Shura than for me.  She fell in love and had her first child there, and as we drove by the grocery store she was reminded of going there at 11 pm to get ice cream with Bruce, and standing on the cart while he pushed her around the store.  We drove by the house where Adah was born and where she and Bruce lived while they started a family that is now changing. 

On to Marlboro:  we missed the turn off route 9 for MacArthur road (we were going to Jason MacArthur's house, it is still that small of a town), so we debated if we should turn around or continue on to South road and make our way back on the dirt road through Marlboro called Ames Hill.  We opted for the latter and as soon as the choice was made I knew we couldn't avoid going to campus and having a look around.  Shura pulled the car up to the dining hall and out walked a group of students, the first of which had a head of spikey dreadlocks sticking out in every direction.  I burst into laughter wondering a- how did she and I ever fit in here, or did we?  and b- how much have we changed since?  Inside the dining hall were postings for the things that made it seem like it will never change: Elizabethan Fencing, Feminism on Campus, and the town meeting minutes and selectboard meeting minutes.  We checked the old cookie drawer but it was empty, not even crumbs - even for someone who can't eat cookies, that was a devastating blow to my memory of Marlboro traditions.

We got back on the South Road, turned onto Ames Hill and bumped along to Fox Road, then Stark Road, and finally to MacArthur Road.  We drove right by the driveway and had to back up to see the wooden sign that read "Harvest Party" to know which driveway to turn down.  We couldn't stop laughing at ourselves as we held hands and walked up the dirt driveway, stumbling over rocks and roots, nearly falling into the stream on the side of the driveway.  It never gets that dark in the city - we were out of practice on it, as well as dirt road driving, all of it. 

Walking into Jason and Lauren's house, the long flowy layers everyone wore, the smokey smell and dry heat of the wood stove, the ages of the kids and adults ranging from newborns to 80 year olds, we thought about how long it had been since we lived with woodstoves, in houses built by the residents, and on farmland.  It was a little bit of a shock to realize that four years after we'd moved away, starting our urban lives, and become entrenched in the pace of city living, so many of our friends had stayed mostly the same.  They've stayed in rural Southeastern Vermont, bought land and built their own homes, married and had kids, but still belong to the co-op, attend the same contra dances, and lectures at the college.  We spent hours in the back yard being warmed by the bonfire, watching the sparks fly up and blend in with a starrier sky than I have seen in ages, talking with Tristan and Julia about the final stages of construction on their new house.

We woke up the next morning as Jason was ladling cream off the top of a jug of raw un-homogenized milk for our coffee (from Lilac Ridge Farm just up the road), the woodstove being rekindled by Lauren to warm up the now chilled house, and smoke rising from the smoldering pile of branches in the backyard.   We got in the car and made our way up to Waterbury where Shura ran her forst 1/2 marathon and I shivered awaiting her return, not feeling remotely down on myself for my lack of interest in running.  Back into the car, I drove her minivan back to Boston with a pit stop at Trader Joe's and said goodbye as I turned in for a night of readying myself for the impending DOE site visit.  I took a bath to rid myself of the chill in my bones and couldn't quite stop marveling at how different my life is now, but how thankful I am to still have those friends.  It was a treat like no other to reconnect with old friends, but especially to have so many hours out of cell range in a car with a friend who's life has made some changes in parallel to mine to look back on my path with her. 

At one point driving North Shura said she needed to remind herself to let the land in, and let the beauty to affect her psyche, since she's been so defended from her emotions lately.  I felt so far from that goal in the car, my calculated eye monitoring every change in the pace of traffic, worrying about tomorrow, and refusing to let my guard down.  I think though, a few days out, that I really did escape this weekend, I feel like I spent 24 hours somewhere else entirely, and I miss it.